Coping With An Impotent Husband
Trying to figure out how to live or cope with an impotent husband was once a subject which was never discussed in polite society, if at all. Today, television commercials hawk products dealing with the subject, and those products are for the most part generally considered to be safe and effective in treating male impotency, or at least erectile dysfunction.
While there may be many causes of impotency, as well as a number of symptoms, the one usually experienced by an impotent husband is erectile dysfunction, a condition that has not only physical consequences, but usually creates some mental and emotional problems as well.
An impotent husband is not proud of his situation, and although he may not be in denial, he is usually unwilling to talk about it, be it with his wife or his doctor, and certainty not with his mother. At the first sign of impotency, a husband's first reaction is invariably to do nothing. In fact, it may take several years of prodding, before he will be willing to discuss the matter with his doctor. An impotent husband almost always regards the problem as being temporary, and often justifiably, as a case of erectile dysfunction is something that happens to most males at one time or another, and quite often occurs during their initial sexual experience. Most men would rather wait and hope that things go better the next time than talk about the problem.
The worst thing a wife can do when trying to deal with an impotent husband is point a finger of blame. Unless alcohol or some other lifestyle factor is the cause of the impotency, there may be little a man can do about it except feel frustrated, and pointing the finger of blame will only make matters worse.
A Disease Could Be The Cause - There are also instances where impotency is merely a symptom of some deeper disorder or disease. This could be a situation in which a wife has a bit of leverage, at least to the extent she might convince her husband to undergo a physical check-up to see if there is indeed an underlying problem. If impotency is the result of a disease, it is unlikely to be cured until the disease has been treated.
More than anything, an impotent husband needs love and support, and the biggest problem is often that of convincing him that he does need support, at least to the extent that he needs to help himself by being willing to talk about the situation to the one, his wife, trying to give him that support. It's best initially, not to ask the husband "what are you going to do about this?", but rather ask, "what do you think we should be trying to do about the situation?”
If the husband is being stubborn, or defensive, the chances are good that he will also regard any suggestion his wife may make with a degree of suspicion. This is natural, but the wife needs to be careful not to bring any hidden agenda to the table. Impotency is a highly personal issue with both partners, but especially with the man.
A Team Effort - Probably the best thing a wife can do is make herself part of the problem, which is not to say a part of the cause, but very definitely a beneficiary of any cure. An impotent husband is more likely to go along with his wife's wishes if resolving the problem becomes something that husband and wife can work towards as a team. At some point professional counseling may well be advisable, and if this is the case, both husband and wife should be present in any and all discussions. Love and support is the best medicine of all.